Friday, May 20, 2011

Train from Boston to Bombay

Train from Boston to Bombay

Disclaimer: I am a customer and I can demand anything that money can buy.

Planes are supposed to be the rich vehicles. I mean compared to car, rickshaws etc, planes are superior vehicles. But many of my friends and me have a lot against planes. I will specially focus on international flights.

Lot of my engineering friends go to US for pursuing their higher studies. Every December when the holiday season in US is at peak, everyone wants to come back to Bombay (I am purposely using Bombay and not Mumbai…I am politically neutral as such!!). They want to come back to the happening city. They want to eat WADA PAV, visit Marine drive, Haji Ali, Nariman Point. They want to meet friends, relatives…have all the fun that the three weeks allow them to.

However, during these times airlines start acting pricey. Adding insult to injury, many of my veggie friends feel that food in the airlines is not worth it. Many of my non-drinking friends feel ripped since they don’t drink tons of whiskeys which Pakistani flyers do to get their moneys worth. There is no standard set for the prices of the airlines. One has to keep on browsing internet daily to find the cheapest deals. Luggage is always an issue. Guajarati junta generally finds this as the biggest issue because invariably they have a lot to bring because invariably they have a hug relative-friend circle. One cannot sleep in plane except for Business class. It’s too much to expect the cattle class to travel in business class. Spaces are cramped. Air hostesses are good but I won’t spend 50 K tickets for that. I would rather become the member of Naughty America. There are n numbers of issues and planes suck.

I want Sonia Gandhi and Obama to start a railway line between Boston to Bombay. They should build underground pillars to support railway tracks. There are a couple of oceans and few thousands of kms. Why to spend so much on NASA? Spend on something useful. As such also NASA’s success ratio is lesser than my mathematics score which was thankfully not in negative. We can use African laborers. We will get cheaper labor. We should primarily target employees from Zimbabwe and…OO..OBAMA KNOWS better than me which countries to target!! The speed of the train should be better than that of stupid planes. Its ok if we don’t have air hostesses…we will serve our own food and water also. We can have all the features applicable in Indian railways. R A/C , Waiting Lists, reservations for old. I also want student discount. All the folks from Boston will book tickets in September.

I am a customer and can demand anything money can buy…and if Obama and Manmo..sorry…Sonia agree folks at Northeastern University, Boston are going to throw a party for me…the only purpose for the article!!

2 comments:

saumil said...

waah.. nice idea but train hostess honi chaiye :)

swe4288 said...

haha, nice idea...but i'd like some food and drinks to be served too...or at least have a pantry like we have in our trains ;)